Yet another international business etiquette conundrum.
My sister is lucky enough to have left the rain-soaked UK and moved to the much more pleasing climate of Toulouse in the South West of France. One year into her exciting new life and she has secured a great job but has encountered a rather large cultural hurdle that she has struggled to overcome, despite being fluent in French.
There are blogs-a-plenty out there regarding international business etiquette covering things like handshakes, eye contact, business cards, dining with clients and other cultural differences that need to be taken into account when doing business in other countries. However, there isn’t an awful lot in the public domain about how and when you should “bisou” (kiss) a colleague.
In the UK and the US a handshake is reserved for first introductions or contacts that you meet infrequently. It isn’t something that tends to be used with people that you see every day in the office and a simple “good morning” will usually suffice.
So, imagine you’re suddenly in a professional environment where colleagues greet each other in meetings with a kiss on each cheek. Now, this seems simple enough; you watch what other people are doing and replicate, right? Wrong.

Even world leaders get it wrong.
It seems that there are some people you kiss and some you do not. There are some that everyone in the room kisses but that you don’t know well enough to, so they recoil in horror at your over familiar gesture. Then, when your handshake is met with someone leaning in to bisou you, imagine the offence you may have caused with your cold, formal, British greeting.
My sister obviously did what any sensible person would do. She asked her French friends what the “rules” are. It soon became clear that this approach wasn’t going to be particularly helpful however. Some said it was unusual to kiss in a working environment and had never come across this during their careers in France, while others got into huge debate around what that rules are. I decided to help her by asking a French intern at my UK workplace who was equally baffled and couldn’t provide a clear answer. The results of our combined market research into the rules of this element of business communication….there are no rules.
At first she dreaded running the morning gauntlet, filled with fear around who she was going to offend on that particular day with her clumsy British salutations. However, time has passed and she is getting the hang of it, based on getting to know the individuals, following their lead and not worrying as much about getting things wrong occasionally.
I am sure that nobody was genuinely offended in those initial months in the new job. However, it would be interesting to know if anybody has encountered similar confusion and if, hidden away somewhere, there are concrete rules to help us Brits fit in more quickly in the rest of Europe!







Having attended the London launch of